I’ve been married almost 14 years (I’m 35) to my high school sweetheart. I haven’t been without a partner since we broke up for a year in college. And I love her…but I feel like I wouldn’t do so bad alone. I don’t think I’d go out a lot. I think I’d mostly stay in. I’m happy in the time I get to myself. I think most people in the Army have really lonely and horrible times on deployments so they reach out and seek companionship throughout. I don’t. I seek the isolation and sort of relish in it. I’m decent company.
Now, there are time when I curl up at night and hug my pillow and I wallow a bit. But even the tough times by myself are inspiring. I kind of like to feel both the down and the up emotions. It’s nice to feel.
Ahh! maybe that’s it. When I’m home sometimes I try to tune out how I feel because I don’t want the wife to see me upset. When I’m deployed I can bask in it. I’m not muted when I’m alone. It feels great, even when it feels horrible, to turn the volume up. As a matter of fact, the hard times may make the good times peak even higher. -Carl Miller