Wife Searching Ex-Boyfriends on Facebook

My wife and I share a Facebook account. I was messing around with the account yesterday and discovered an “activity register.” I saw in the register that my wife looked up three men we went to high school with 15 years ago. The first was her boyfriend before me. The next was a guy she hung around with in the past, but I’m not certain they were ever romantic. The last was a fling she had during college when she and I were in a break in our relationship.


From what I can gather from the register she only searched them one time. Is this something to worry about or natural curiosity? I don’t think that we’re in a period of struggle in our relationship. We do have two children (7 and 9) that take up a large amount of our time. She is a stay at home mother and griped the other day that she needed a change in the routine. I took that statement to mean she was tired of daily laundry, vacuuming, cooking, etc. So, I started pitching in more after work. Do you think she really meant that she’s tired of our relationship? What should I do? I don’t want to lose her. -Carl Miller

Inherent Selfishness

I heard a guy say today that everything he does is for his sons. I’m sure he was sincere, but I couldn’t help thinking he was wrong. We live in a constant state of suffering – yearning. I’m rarely satisfied. My hunger never stops. Even if I satisfy my stomach with food I yearn for energy, or sleep, or warmth, or relief from too much warmth. I can’t stop the dissatisfaction. It doesn’t go away. There may be moments when discomfort or emptiness falls out of my immediate consciousness, but those moments are short…minutes at most. That guy does a few things for his sons, but he mostly lives for himself. He adjusts the thermostat, sleeps 10 minutes longer, stops at the 7-11 for a snack, and strives for workplace glory with selfish motivation. His sons merely benefit from certain portions of his selfishness. –Carl Miller